Joke - Diet Update

[bstardchild]

A man was ordered by his doctor to lose 75 lbs. due to very serious
health risks. As he wondered how in the heck he would ever do it, he
ran across an ad in the newspaper for a GUARANTEED WEIGHT LOSS PROGRAM.
"Guaranteed. Yeah right!" he thought to himself.

But desperate, he calls them up and subscribes to the 3-day/10 pound
weight loss program.

The next day there's a knock at his door, and when he answers,there
stands before him a voluptuous, athletic, 19 year old young lady dressed
in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign round her neck.
She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.
The sign reads, "If you can catch me, you can have me!"

Without a second thought he takes off after her. A few miles later,
huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.
After they are through and she leaves, he thinks to himself, "I like the
way this company does business!"

The same girl shows up for the next two days and the same thing
happens. On the fourth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find
he has lost 10lb as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/ 20 pound program. The
next day there's a knock at the door and there stands the most stunning,
beautiful, sexy woman he has ever seen in his life,wearing nothing but
Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you
catch me, you can have me."

He's out the door and after her like a shot. This girl is in excellent
shape and it takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it is
worth every cramp and wheeze.

For the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight,
on the fifth day, he weighs himself and found he has lost another 20lbs.
as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50
pound program. "Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone.
"This is our most rigorous program." "Absolutely," he replies, "I
haven't felt this good in years". The next day there's a knock at the
door and when he opens it he finds a muscular guy standing there wearing
nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads,
"If I catch you, you're mine."